Thursday, October 15, 2009

Give Me The Stone, Harry Potter!!

Voldemort lives! (and in Alabama apparently)

I couldn't resist posting this one.

Source: Oddee

Today's Ugly Tattoo: Alf

Just great. This totally steals the thunder away from the Mr. Belvedere tattoo was I was going to get on my ass later today. Bastards.

DAMN THE MAN: Let's deface some money.

Boredom gives birth to deliciously cool anarchy like this. Web of Entertainment has posted 25 hilariously defaced bills - some of which I'm posting here. My fave: Sparta!

View the rest of them here.

I Had No Idea Someone Could Be THIS Drunk

This is security camera footage of a super drunk guy attemping to buy beer. If it wasn't for his rendition of the Drunken Man Tango™, he probably would've gotten away with it. It's the part where he falls and "tries" to get up for three minutes that's out of hand.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Mindless Game of the Day: Magic Dots

This isn't really a game per se, but it's fun to just go here for mindless mindlessness. When you scroll over the dots, they multiply - simple as that. Good to do when talking on the phone or pretending to work in your cube. Play here.

Source: Boingboing

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Today's WTF: Bacon Cross

Bacon is life.

No really, it's bacon on your ass, right above your crack FOREVER. I see an angioplasty in this person's future.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Happy Birthday to Me!

Today's my birthday, five readers! Pamper me with Sprinkles cupcakes, J. Crew and lumpia.

Mickey Doyle

The Future of Indoor Transportation

Honda unveiled it's new "future of indoor transportation" last month, called the Enicycle U3-X. As you can see from the video, it's a little mini scooter that allows you to glide from cube to cube delivering TPS reports and spreadsheets and shiz. They're hoping to use them in big hotels and large offices. SUCK IT, RAZOR SCOOTER! YOU'RE OLD NEWS NOW! Pixar and all the cool agencies like Goodby Silverstein or Crispin Porter will be switching over to the U3-X next year.

If you ask me, this little vehicle is just a pre cursor to the Buy N Large recliner folks were using in Wall-E. We're going to be large amorphous blobs of consumerism zombies soon. Mark my words.

Core 77

Thursday, September 24, 2009

We got a leaner: Matthew McConaughey

The Huffington Post has made a unique discovery about everybody's favorite romcom leading dude: Matthew McConaughey. Apparently, the shirtless wonder is only effective while leaning in advertising, posters or DVD covers. Weird. Kind of like John Malkovich's height.

Crassy Thursday: A Tattoo Grandma will Probably See

Wow. Just ... wow. I'm hoping this person doesn't have a job where this type of ink won't be viewed by clients, customers, shareholders, grandmas, little children with impressionable minds, paranoid schizophrenics, homicidal sociopaths with mommy issues, etc.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Passive-aggressive Kitchen Notes: Bacon is Life!

Those of us who have worked in an office environment or have had one or more roommates know that it's hell sharing a fridge or kitchen space. And we all know that a leaving passive-aggressive kitchen note is one step away from blowing everybody in the building away with an AK. (I have to say that's not a good day.)

Whether it's "stop effing eating my soup" or "I hawked a loogie in my 2-liter of Diet Dr. Pepper so you would stop drinking it" - kitchen notes happen. (When they do, run.) Lucky for us, Holy Taco has posted 25 hilarious passive-aggressive kitchen notes between coworkers and roommates. I've only posted a few; you can view the rest here.

Bacon is life, bitches!

Source: Holy Taco

Roll Me a Fat Piece: Rick Roll Cake for Any Occasion

Nothing completes a birthday bash like getting unexpectedly Rick Roll'd via your birthday cake. Top THAT!


You Twisted My Arm: One More Kanye Post

Okay, I'm officially over the Kanye West interruption meme. If you feel like you need to see more, you can check out this
site and this site. Enjoy the last of Kanye's douchetastic voyage through interruption land.

Source: URLesque

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Kanye C-blocks Super Mario Bros.

Just keep the Kanye jokes coming, America. I'll be here to post 'em. This one is almost better than the Michael Jackson Super Mario Brothers game.

iPhone is our hero.


Love it.

Want more of it.

And $5 if you got it.

Seriously. Can I borrow five bucks? No? Okay, no biggs.

Same old Snuggie, twice the nerd.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Why, for the love of all that is batter-dipped?!! A two-headed Snuggie?! Next there will be group snuggies and family snuggies and snuggies for zoo animals and beer snuggies and feet snuggies and penis snuggies ...

The end is near.

Don't C-block me, Kanye.

Kanye's epic c-block will forever go down in history.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Is that a botfly maggot in your head or are you just happy to see me?

Here is a video of a woman named Vanessa pulling a botfly maggot out of her scalp - after acquiring it during a trip to Belize. It's fairly graphic, but at the same time hard to not watch.

Enjoy your fried rice while you watch!


Thursday, September 3, 2009

Today's WTF: Cooking with Balls

Surprisingly, this innovative cook book has been out for well over a year. I guess I'm not well versed on the latest cookbooks featuring testicle cuisine. And I think I'm okay with that.

This e-book teaches you the "basics" of cooking with balls, including important tidbits like "always using a very sharp knife, washing testes thoroughly for 45 minutes before preparing or the fact that all testicles can be eaten ... except for human, of course."

Most of the featured testes come from stallions, ostriches, bulls, pigs, turkeys and large non-sporting dogs. Okay, I threw in that last one - couldn't resist.

I can't wait to try a heaping helping of Balleroni and Cheese or Ballcakes and sausage. Even better - mashed balltatoes and ballvy.

Holy Crap! A Sequel to Boondock Saints? Rock on!

I had absolutely no clue there was a Boondock Saints sequel in the works - and I'm pretty well versed in movies that kick some arse. I was pleased to see that Julie Benz, of Dexter fame, is starring as the Willem Dafoe stand in. I can live with that; she's pretty smoking hot.

Source: IWatchStuff

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Latest Poster for Smurfs 3D

Clearly, this smurf has realized that he has no way to use the bathroom., which has all things smurfy, has posted this new ad piece for the Smurfs movie. Wonder if they're hiring.

Monday, August 31, 2009

That is One Ugly Tattoo

Something tells me that I'd fail a Rorschach test miserably. Is it just me, or does this tattoo of "Courtney" seem to have a dude's package on her forehead? I'm all for photorealistic tattoos, but for the love all things Benjamin Button, get a damn good tattoo artist if you're planning to have a face inked on your body for the rest of eternity.

Friday, August 28, 2009

Hey, I like Jason Mraz, too but ...

I wouldn't have the vacant expression from his CD cover tattooed on my back for eternity.

Today's WTF: The Snuggie

For those of you loyal Snuggie owners or Snuggie Sapiens™, as I like to call you, there is a new online guide to having relations while including your now iconic blanket robe. You can check out the Snuggie Sutra HERE.

I'm not sure if the creators of the Snuggie Sutra site know this, but the target demo for Snuggie consumers is something like 45-65 year-old librarians who utilize book lights and watch reruns of Murder She Wrote. But I'm sure they'll be all over this new Snuggie resource though. Especially if they find themselves in the throes ... with a Snuggie on hand ... while taking the subway or relaxing on a park bench. Knowledge is power. And possibly a misdemeanor.

100 Years of Special Effects in 5 minutes

I'm a little surprised that there aren't more horror movie special effects included in this clip. I guess you see one head torture contraption crush a skull, you've seen them all.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Insert Obvious Tea Bag Joke Here.

I really couldn't think of a better way to defecate all over the memory of Princess Di then to create a tea bag in her likeness. The other three douches I couldn't care less about.

Dexter Season 4: Pre-air Leak of Episode 1!

Those of you rowdy Dexter fans out there - hold on to your butts.

Apparently, Dexer's first episode of Season 4, "Living the Dream," has been leaked online. Scheduled to air on September 27 on Showtime, this premiere episode was posted online a few days ago for only a few hours before Showtime caught on and had it pulled from the Net. Wow, did I really use the term, "Net?" Hello, 1993!

Showtime may have pulled the original posting, but not before 2,000 torrent users had a chance to make it their own and seed it online. There's no telling how long it will stay posted - but you can watch the full first episode of Season 4 here or here. Enjoy.

You'll especially enjoy the fun 'pseudo opening'.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Celebribabies: Classic.

Photoshop + babies = celebribabies. My fave, even though I hate those douchetards, is the Jonas Brothers pic. Here you'll see baby Kurt Cobain, baby Tony Soprano, baby Jackie Chan, Baby Conan O'Brien, and baby Jonas Brothers.