Sunday, September 27, 2009

Today's WTF: Bacon Cross

Bacon is life.

No really, it's bacon on your ass, right above your crack FOREVER. I see an angioplasty in this person's future.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Happy Birthday to Me!

Today's my birthday, five readers! Pamper me with Sprinkles cupcakes, J. Crew and lumpia.

Mickey Doyle

The Future of Indoor Transportation

Honda unveiled it's new "future of indoor transportation" last month, called the Enicycle U3-X. As you can see from the video, it's a little mini scooter that allows you to glide from cube to cube delivering TPS reports and spreadsheets and shiz. They're hoping to use them in big hotels and large offices. SUCK IT, RAZOR SCOOTER! YOU'RE OLD NEWS NOW! Pixar and all the cool agencies like Goodby Silverstein or Crispin Porter will be switching over to the U3-X next year.

If you ask me, this little vehicle is just a pre cursor to the Buy N Large recliner folks were using in Wall-E. We're going to be large amorphous blobs of consumerism zombies soon. Mark my words.

Core 77

Thursday, September 24, 2009

We got a leaner: Matthew McConaughey

The Huffington Post has made a unique discovery about everybody's favorite romcom leading dude: Matthew McConaughey. Apparently, the shirtless wonder is only effective while leaning in advertising, posters or DVD covers. Weird. Kind of like John Malkovich's height.

Crassy Thursday: A Tattoo Grandma will Probably See

Wow. Just ... wow. I'm hoping this person doesn't have a job where this type of ink won't be viewed by clients, customers, shareholders, grandmas, little children with impressionable minds, paranoid schizophrenics, homicidal sociopaths with mommy issues, etc.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Passive-aggressive Kitchen Notes: Bacon is Life!

Those of us who have worked in an office environment or have had one or more roommates know that it's hell sharing a fridge or kitchen space. And we all know that a leaving passive-aggressive kitchen note is one step away from blowing everybody in the building away with an AK. (I have to say that's not a good day.)

Whether it's "stop effing eating my soup" or "I hawked a loogie in my 2-liter of Diet Dr. Pepper so you would stop drinking it" - kitchen notes happen. (When they do, run.) Lucky for us, Holy Taco has posted 25 hilarious passive-aggressive kitchen notes between coworkers and roommates. I've only posted a few; you can view the rest here.

Bacon is life, bitches!

Source: Holy Taco

Roll Me a Fat Piece: Rick Roll Cake for Any Occasion

Nothing completes a birthday bash like getting unexpectedly Rick Roll'd via your birthday cake. Top THAT!


You Twisted My Arm: One More Kanye Post

Okay, I'm officially over the Kanye West interruption meme. If you feel like you need to see more, you can check out this
site and this site. Enjoy the last of Kanye's douchetastic voyage through interruption land.

Source: URLesque

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Kanye C-blocks Super Mario Bros.

Just keep the Kanye jokes coming, America. I'll be here to post 'em. This one is almost better than the Michael Jackson Super Mario Brothers game.

iPhone is our hero.


Love it.

Want more of it.

And $5 if you got it.

Seriously. Can I borrow five bucks? No? Okay, no biggs.

Same old Snuggie, twice the nerd.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Why, for the love of all that is batter-dipped?!! A two-headed Snuggie?! Next there will be group snuggies and family snuggies and snuggies for zoo animals and beer snuggies and feet snuggies and penis snuggies ...

The end is near.

Don't C-block me, Kanye.

Kanye's epic c-block will forever go down in history.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Is that a botfly maggot in your head or are you just happy to see me?

Here is a video of a woman named Vanessa pulling a botfly maggot out of her scalp - after acquiring it during a trip to Belize. It's fairly graphic, but at the same time hard to not watch.

Enjoy your fried rice while you watch!


Thursday, September 3, 2009

Today's WTF: Cooking with Balls

Surprisingly, this innovative cook book has been out for well over a year. I guess I'm not well versed on the latest cookbooks featuring testicle cuisine. And I think I'm okay with that.

This e-book teaches you the "basics" of cooking with balls, including important tidbits like "always using a very sharp knife, washing testes thoroughly for 45 minutes before preparing or the fact that all testicles can be eaten ... except for human, of course."

Most of the featured testes come from stallions, ostriches, bulls, pigs, turkeys and large non-sporting dogs. Okay, I threw in that last one - couldn't resist.

I can't wait to try a heaping helping of Balleroni and Cheese or Ballcakes and sausage. Even better - mashed balltatoes and ballvy.

Holy Crap! A Sequel to Boondock Saints? Rock on!

I had absolutely no clue there was a Boondock Saints sequel in the works - and I'm pretty well versed in movies that kick some arse. I was pleased to see that Julie Benz, of Dexter fame, is starring as the Willem Dafoe stand in. I can live with that; she's pretty smoking hot.

Source: IWatchStuff

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Latest Poster for Smurfs 3D

Clearly, this smurf has realized that he has no way to use the bathroom., which has all things smurfy, has posted this new ad piece for the Smurfs movie. Wonder if they're hiring.