I have no idea how this random combination came to be, but I'm sure it involved a 24-pack of PBR, a mullet, and a 20-dollar taxi ride to the patent office. Buy one of these bat boys (zing!) here.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Baseball Bat Pepper Mill: Spice Your Salad Then Beat Some A$$
I have no idea how this random combination came to be, but I'm sure it involved a 24-pack of PBR, a mullet, and a 20-dollar taxi ride to the patent office. 
iPhone Sleeve: Baconpressive. Most Baconpressive.
1) I love bacon. My cholesterol can vouch for that.
2) I love iPhone accessories.
3) I once had a cut on my finger, so I put bacon on it and it healed in just five days. True story.
Buy this rad iPhone sleeve here for only $43. (Dang, that's a little pricey in this economic climate.)
So True
I'm not sure what's worse. The fact that he looks like a deranged, roided out Ronald McDonald - or the confirmation that the drapes actually do match the carpet. Gah.Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Stop Smelling Like A
Stop smelling like warm garbage or dried Elmer's Glue with Doc Bottoms' new Aspray. You can use Aspray on your "pungent pits, foul feet, or beastly butt odor." (exact wording - no lie) This miracle product apparently eliminates odor-causing bacteria ... that you deem inappropriate to actually wash off with a simple shower. Really, who has time to shower these days? Why shower at all when you can drench every crevice of your body with Aspray? Accidentally shart your pants? Break out the Aspray! Did you have relations with a brothel bunny and forget to shower? Break out the Aspray!
I'll never bathe again - THANK YOU, ASPRAY!
VIA HolyTaco
The First One to Pass Out Always Gets Screwed
WHY GOD WHY: Personal Urns
Dear Family:
After I die, please place my ashes in a replica of my disembodied head so I can stare at you forever more. Or, just use my head as a cookie jar.
See you on the flip side,
Mickey Doyle
XOXO, K.I.T.
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